SAHDism

a collection of thoughts by a Stay At Home Dad

“The Year of Living Sequeiralously”

Our First Weekend Away

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After almost seven years, my wife and I are having our first weekend away from the kids.  A couple of years ago we had a couple of opportunities to head out to a hotel and spa for a night but were back the next morning.  This time, we’re going to Vegas as my wife has a training class there so I’m just buying my ticket and we’re off.  The first time we did this was a couple of months before we got engaged and it was in Kauai.  It’s fun reflecting back nine years to that trip and everything that’s come into our lives since then.

My wife is feeling a little sad and missing the kids.  She’s also a little curious/concerned that I feel none of those things.  Then again, for me, it’s still to early to miss them.  It’s six a.m. on the morning after I dropped them off at my sister-in-law’s place and right now it just feels like the blissful quiet pre-dawn time that I enjoy before the daily chaos.  Perhaps around 9 a.m., when it’s still quiet, I’ll start to feel the emptiness.  Until then, I’ll just enjoy a quiet cup of coffee.

Incredible Skills in the Animal Kingdom

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My kids were watching a children’s show about incredible animal skills.  They got to the elephant and were explaining that the elephant can actually use the tip of its nose to pinch and pick up things – “what a great feature, to be able to use its nose as a hand !”

Big deal, I think.  My kids have been blurring the line between hand and nose for years…

A Good Morning

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Before having kids, a good morning was one where I would leisurely read the newspaper, watching the sun come up over the city skyline and mountains in the background, sipping a hot cup of coffee.

Now, a good morning is one during which I manage to get all three kids out the door without swearing.

My Extensive Wardrobe

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While I never would have made the cover of GQ, I did take pride in dressing sharply for both work and social events whenever appropriate.  Polishing my shoes and pressing my shirts were as enjoyable as the finished result.

Today as I sort and fold laundry, I realize how far I’ve drifted from my previous life.  I have separate categories for “exercise t-shirts,” daily wear t-shirts,” and “dressy t-shirts.”

Flashback To Our First Car Jam Session

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As I was driving to pick up my kids from school one sunny afternoon, I was lucky enough to catch War Pigs by Black Sabbath on the radio.  What could be better to rockin’ out to War Pigs?  Flashing back five years ago when my daughter was just old enough to sit in a front-facing car seat and watching her in the rear-view mirror as she pumps her fists and shakes her head to War Pigs.  It was the first time she rocked out in the car and not only does it make me a Proud Papa but it’s such a fond memory of the two of us at the start of my life as a stay-at-home-dad.

What Makes a Bad Day

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So I woke up this Monday morning well rested and feeling great after a weekend of exercise and productive house projects.  Until, of course, I discovered that the dog barfed on our bedroom rug, my wife had a killer migraine, and my son barfed on the way to school.  Who knew bad days could be contagious?

Schrodinger’s Kids

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For you parents who are also quantum physics buffs, may I present a thought experiment, something I call “Schrodinger’s Kids”…

My kids are in a spotless room filled with finger paints, markers, and scissors.  I am elsewhere in the house, completely unaware of what is happening inside the room.  The room could be either in its earlier pristine condition or it could have decayed into a horrid post-apocalyptic shit heap.  Do I make the observation?

Perhaps It’s Time To Get Out

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As I stood there in my boxers, ironing my wife’s pants for work while belting out some Adele, I thought that perhaps I’ve been a house husband a bit too long.

An Interesting Tradeoff

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My youngest is finally potty training.  As I watched him in the bathroom,  standing on his step-stool, a full foot-and-a-half above the toilet, I realized that whatever money we may save in diapers will be spent on paper towels cleaning up the three-foot radius.

Sweetness Over Time

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About a week ago, my youngest comes into the garage covered in sugar.  I had been in the middle of moving and arranging items as we are still in the middle of getting settled into our new house and his appearance in such a state really dampened my day (to put it mildly).  I had forgetfully left the jar on the counter instead of putting it in the cabinet and he had brought his step stool over to reach it.  I angrily whisked him off to the shower and scolded him for getting into the sugar jar.

My anger came from my feeling that he took advantage of a simple mistake while being preoccupied with trying to move into a new house while watching three kids.   I know it wasn’t out of spite – he just saw the sugar and wanted it – but it was frustrating not being able to leave the kids alone to play for a little bit so I could get a house project done.

As I was showering and scolding, my Dad took the empty sugar jar and placed it out of sight in back of the microwave, just to keep it out of the way.

That was a week ago.  Now, on a random weekday morning, as I am making a cup of tea in the calm quiet of a sleeping house, I find the empty sugar container and finally refill it so I can have my tea.  I smile as I recall the incident and picture him barely reaching the counter on his step stool to get the sugar and then sticking his fist in the bowl to finish every last bit of sweet crunchy goodness.  My son is a week older now, and with each passing week, he gets closer to growing up and moving on.

I’m fairly confident that the next time something like this happens, I’m going to get pissed off again.  Not sure if I can help that – I’ll get caught off guard when I’m tired and cranky and my kids are doing something they really shouldn’t be doing.  Even so, next time, I hope I find the sugar jar a little sooner, maybe after only three days.