Category: SAHD-isms
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Motivation
I get the best workouts when I bring my kids to the drop-in-day-care at the gym, primarily because if I stop working out, they give me my kids back
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A Terrible Misnomer
It was a sad day when I realized that “The Terrible Twos” don’t actually, as one might reasonably assume, end after the age of two
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Stu’s Diet Breakthrough
Hey Parents, here’s a little tip to help shed those unwanted pounds…
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Hello Tom, Goodbye Kids
…made a Tom Collins with homemade Gomme Syrup, carbonated water, lemon juice, and Tanqueray Rangpur gin. Stay tuned for my new movie, “Honey, I’m Completely Oblivious to the Kids”
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Daddy’s Little Girl
Daddy is a Little Girl’s first true love, and a Little Girl is her Daddy’s last.
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Six Pack Abs
I have developed a revolutionary new Ab Workout called “go-to-the-community-pool-and-suck-in-your-gut-for-two-hours”
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Girlie Hairdos
People know it when I do my daughter’s hair because she looks straight out of the 80’s. I suppose it’s because that’s the last time I had hair
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Mommy-Daddy Time
when you go to the Red Cross to donate blood and they ask you questions like, “Have you ever traded drugs for sex?” – does that include giving the kids Benadryl
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My Little Army Brats
I think our kids should be in the military … General Nuisance, Major Pain, and Corporal Punishment…
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Early Mornings
When I wake up at 4:45 am, I think to myself, “I only have 2 hours and 15 minutes of quiet before my kids wake up.”